Sleep Deprived

People are always asking me, “Are the babies sleeping through the night yet?  Are they sleeping well for you?”

Last month, I was able to reply with a smile and a shake of the head, “No, we aren’t sleeping yet.  But we’ll get there!”  *encouraging smile + friendly head tilt*

(and of course, they always have to add, “oh REALLY?  My babies all slept through the night by 6 weeks!”  )

Now, as the months wear on and the babies continue to wake every 2 hours, my reply is becoming a bit more *ahem* clipped (at least in my head): “NO THEY ARE NOT, WOMAN!  Look at my red rimmed eyes!  The cup of coffee ever-present in my hand!  The giant circles under my eyes!  Do I LOOK like I’m sleeping!?”

Am I tired?  No, no I am not.  Tired would be an improvement over my current state.  I am SLEEP DEPRIVED.  When you are sleep deprived the following happens to you:

1.  You aren’t sure what your son’s middle name is (granted, the name only got made up 4 months ago, and he’s 1 of 2, so there are TWO new middle names to remember, but still…I think that’s a sign of advanced Alzheimer’s when you can’t remember your own child’s name)

2.  You try to put your clothes on over your pajamas

3.  You wash your hair with conditioner

4.  You cannot remember which thing is called the “washing machine” and which the “dishwasher” and get in an endless spiraling confused conversation with your 6 year old over which machine you used to clean his favorite cup:

“Mom, where is my Superman cup?”

“Oh, I put it in the washing machine.”

“The WASHING MACHINE?  Why did you put it there?  Clothes go in there!  Do you mean the dishwasher?

“What?  Oh, sorry, yes, I meant to say, the washing machine.”

“Mommy, you said washing machine again!  Did you wash my cup with my clothes?  I don’t think that would work well.”

“Stephen!  I told you, I put it in the thing that washes the things!!  You know!  Stop being so contrary!”

“But the washing machine is for clothes, so where did you put my cup?”

And so on….


5.  You get some fruit at the Farmer’s Market and end up paying $8 for three things that cost 3 + 5 + 2.  (The lady at the stand was elderly, so we both got it wrong.  I realized it as I was driving home…but at least I got the good end of the mistake!)

So if I can’t remember your name, or I miss our lunch date, or your text, or your email, don’t take it personally!  Just be thankful for all that time you got to spend sleeping and call me back again!


About jennyvogan

Author of "Stephen's Mom," a blog documenting the funny, crazy life of raising four boys while keeping my day job as an ultrasound tech.
This entry was posted in Jenny's thoughts, Parenting. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Sleep Deprived

  1. Well put… rofl, I know sleep deprived all too well!

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